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Chief Synner

Dear Depressed One, Don’t Die Yet…

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I almost died a year ago.

I’m only writing this here because a friend is nursing suicidal thoughts and I need to do this to reach out to him.

Back to how I almost died.

Three bikes. Mine and two others. Head-on.

Mine was coming from this side while two bikes were coming from the other side. A tipper was obstructing the other exit so my bike had only two options.

Swerve right, avoid one bike and crash into the other OR swerve left, avoid one bike and crash into the other.

All week, I had been feeling the aura of death around me. I stopped writing my series for the week ( THE ‘F’ WORD) in a bid to relax and free my mind from any negative energy. We( family) prayed and fast (ed?), yet it hovered like the shadow of an offended ghost.

I disregarded it and finished my series even though inspiration was less than 0%.

Fast forward to the day I board a bike heading out, and it zoomed off.

I saw the accident coming but at that point where everything slowed to a crawl, I COULD DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO STOP IT.
With my hands shielding my head from the strong surface of the tarred road; all thoughts blanked out.

Wait! Not completely all.

At that moment, that snail-like moment, I wondered about the life I thought I was leaving behind. How everything suddenly seemed inconsequential. The money, the books, the writings, the friends, the events, the family, the arguments, the shoes, the clothes, the crushes, the movies, the food, the hustle, the church, my marital status, my religious beliefs, my sexual orientation, the blog… the bike man…

I WAS ON MY OWN.

NOTHING MATTERED.

My bike man tilted slightly to the right and escaped the crash with a hair’s breadth while the other bike men stood still as if they couldn’t believe what just happened. Shock?

When I was lucid enough to snap out of my state, I did a recap of my life.

This is the advice I gave myself when I was done;

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE. LET GO.
IMPACT.
DEATH IS SURE.
BE READY.

 

Have you ever felt depressed? How did you recover from it(if you did)? Care to share?

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